We Have History
by Sarah August
Summary: A one page story on why Elena picked Damon instead of Stefan in 4x23. A little insight on how Elena came to her decision as I felt 4x23 provided none.


Title: We Have History

Summary: Elena's thoughts as she says goodbye to Stefan in 4x23 and accepts that Damon loves her and her relationship with Stefan is over despite secretly desiring otherwise.

Notes: This is for those who were dumbfounded as I was by Elena choosing Damon in 4x23. I wanted for Elena to give insight into her choice after declaring her love for Stefan earlier in the season but deciding to choose Damon anyway.

Pairing: Stelena

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_I don't deserve him_. Elena thought sadly to herself while staring at the cure in her hands. After everything that she'd done, she no longer deserved to be with Stefan. She had no right to expect a future with him, she had no right to expect that he could love her again. That was over, their time was over, no matter how much it hurt inside.

And there was Damon. He loved her, and she was now_ his_. They were together, ever since the sire bond had taken over their relationship, changing it _forever._ When she had switched off her emotions she had believed the sire bond had been the source of the change to their relationship, and Elena had been right. The sire bond had made her believe she had fallen in love with Damon, _really_ in love. No longer the mere feelings, the fledgling of what might have been if she had fallen for him instead of Stefan first.

And Damon had believed she was finally his, and the joy it had brought him had touched her heart. It had felt so good, so wonderful to see Damon actually be happy. But she wasn't in love with him. Elena knew that now. But she couldn't just walk away and crush Damon's new belief in love. His new belief in life again. It wouldn't be right to hurt him like that. She couldn't be like Katherine. Elena didn't think that Damon would survive being hurt like that again.

She had to do this. Elena owed it to him to try and make this work between them. Perhaps in time she would fall in love with Damon. She couldn't expect to just end things with Damon and Stefan would take her back. J_ust like that._

Damon was Stefan's brother. And she had changed their relationship by leaving one brother and going for the other. It had hurt them both in a way that had been different from Katherine. She couldn't cause that kind of hurt to them again. If she did it again, Elena could never forgive herself.

She wasn't_ in love_ with Damon, but she loved him. He was, first and foremost, her friend. And Stefan, she was in love with _him_, and that would never stop. Elena knew it, she could feel that she would always be in love with Stefan. She could never hurt either brother like that, ever again. They meant too much to her.

"I need to do this," Elena told herself aloud. She was going to give Stefan the cure. He deserved this. And because she loved him. And more than anything she wished she could take it with him.

It was Stefan who had wanted a human life with her. He would have wanted whatever she did because he loved her. Damon, despite her asking him, was the exact opposite of Stefan in his response. Damon would want whatever he wanted and that was that. He would never willingly choose to grow old with her. To live and die with her. It was that response which convinced Elena that Damon would never be the one that she was meant to be with. That had been Stefan, and now it was gone. The sire bond had ruined everything for them.

All their hopes and dreams of being together forever, all gone within an eye blink. They could never go back again, and they couldn't go forward together either.

How unfair was fate to separate one from the person you knew that was truly intended just for you. With feeling her heart crush inside her chest, Elena went into the room, fighting to forget that this wasn't normal. She was supposed to rush into Stefan's arms and vow to love him forever if he would have her again.

Instead they had come down to this. She was his brothers girlfriend and his former. Elena no longer had the right to love him, to touch him, and tell Stefan she loved him more than she ever did. It was all gone.

Upon looking into his eyes Elena realized that he was thinking the same things that she did. It wasn't supposed to be like this for them. Fate had robbed them of each other and it physically hurt to be apart as they were. Stefan felt the same emotions as she did, the same feelings that would never go away but they had to ignore now. They had to pretend it never really was. Because she was Damon's girl now, not his.

"You deserve this," She began, fighting not to cry in front of him. Stefan smiled sadly at her, his pain matching hers.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. They were supposed to be together. Never her and Damon.

Elena couldn't hide her shock when he gave it back to her. Of course, it had been all for her. All of his efforts. And Elena could tell that Stefan wanted to confess something more to her, but he didn't dare. He had been hurt too much by her, and the pain was still new. Elena suspected he had forgiven her, but it was still so hard for him to be this new friend to her, and not something more.

Stefan then told her that he was leaving Mystic Falls after dumping Silas's body. Lexi was going to go with him as far as the veil allowed her.

It stung to know that he was leaving, but Elena couldn't argue against it. She had no right to do so. Not anymore. And it hurt, oh how it hurt.

Through tears that refused to fall, Elena forced a smile to her face and wished Stefan well. He was then gone and Elena wanted to cry out in pain at the grief that threatened to consume her.

Truly all that was left for Elena now was Damon. How ironic that was considering she had once despised him less than two years ago. Elena fought the urge to laugh. She felt almost manic with these feelings.

She found Damon alone in the living room of the mansion. He was far from perfect. He would never be the right one, he would never be who she wanted to be with, but he was here _for her_. And that was something she could cling and hold on too, and for that Elena felt grateful to him. Because without Damon she would have nothing but empty rooms and no home to go too.

Her home was gone, Stefan was gone. And Elena felt as if she were about to unravel without him. Being with Damon would keep her sane and from giving into the grief. And for that, she loved him for. _Her friend. _

It would have to be enough for the both of them for now. It was all that Elena was capable of giving.

"_I love you, _Damon," She finally said. How strange the words sounded when spoken aloud. And she meant them in that moment. Without him, she would have nothing left, so how could she not love him?

Elena forced a smile to her face as Damon stared at her in disbelief and went to her. He kissed her passionately so and Elena accepted his kisses. He would love her and she would gladly accept the love he offered freely. Because without it, there was nothing left. There was nothing left but memories of _him. _

"_We have history together,"_ He had told her once.

**THE END**


End file.
